A Brother Too Far

A Brother Too Far.

Assalamu ‘Alaikum,

Being born amongst the youngest in a family of eleven means in adulthood I’m usually spared most of the heads of family duties when it comes to marriage of siblings etc. However things changed when you marry a girl who is amongst the eldest in her family. I married the eldest girl in a family of seven. So when the youngest brother but one, in her family is to be married I found myself promoted in my station in life. I am now a rookie Head of Engagement Delegation on behalf of my young brother in law. At times like this you’d wish MPH will stock your wish list Dummy books like “Head of Bertunang Delegation for Dummies”.

If my brother in law decided to marry someone in Perak or even culturally awesome Negeri Sembilan I wouldn’t have really baulked, but he had of course to choose to marry someone in Limbang Sarawak, a sweet girl he met at a Polytechnic in Kuching.

Fine, so what do I know of Limbang putting aside the Head of Delegation fears for the time being. The ladies in my wife’s family came into the fore when it comes to engagement ‘perhantaran’ and all that. I suspected my wife and her sister had gone to secret night classes for Malay engagements and wedding with their detailed knowledge of what to do which impressed me no end. I was of course already practicing my head of delegation speech in my head. I sought tips from various sifus in my extended family of course, and what came through was the “menyambung silatarrahim’ phrase which I’m told and I found is a natural winner in the scheme of things.

And it was indeed a ‘menyambung silaturrahim’ event indeed on the day of the engagement. My three youngish children found themselves on a journey again having weathered Europe, Johor Baru, Lenggong and now Brunei and Limbang all in a space of four weeks from the start of their school holidays in November. I told them that even before their teacher asked Papa wants a travelogue of what they did during their school holidays in my constant effort to sharpen their English language skills. Adlin went off tangent with a Korean teen age love story, Zahir started page one and sort of took a long break since, and Adila secretive as always, not willing to show me until she has completed the exercise.

I digress; we thanked Air Asia for the huge savings in family flight to Brunei which now include my sister in law and her primary school going daughter, and dad in law and mum in law. We checked in into a family hotel in Bandar Seri Bagawan and waited for my sis in law to be to make the connection. We had no idea in which direction Limbang is and how to get there. Naively I offered we take a taxi there but I’m glad we didn’t, as direction-telling wise to the taxi driver it may have been a bit complicated. Her uncle and son came with two SUVs and we breathed a sigh of relief. And that was where I learnt about a family separated by historical boundary decisions.

We knew she was from Limbang but we had no clue of the family relationships with Brunei. For those whose East Malaysia geography is a bit vague, Limbang is the strip of Sarawak, Malaysian land that splits Brunei into two separate parts. Yes, no land access between Bandar Seri Bagawan Brunei and Temburong Brunei, Malaysia goes straight to the coast. You sought of feel for the Bruneians, for the split of their country into two separate halves, but Wikipedia immediately eased my guilt feelings when I learnt it wasn’t us Malaysians who did the splitting but some White Rajahs well, well before us. We all know of course that at some point in time, in days gone by, the Sultanate of Brunei actually covered almost the whole of Borneo.

I was surprised to learn that my sis in law to be’s father is the only brother this side of the border whereas most or all other brothers and members of his family are on the other side. They or their fathers were all residents of Kampung Lumapas which was split into two when they set the border between Brunei and Malaysia. So I imagined my Kampung Sira in Lenggong Perak split between two countries, Pak Lang Ibrahim’s house which is just a shouting distance away is now in country A, whereas me and my gramps in country B, though I could throw a rubber ball that would go through Pak Lang Ibrahim’s window if I wanted to. Well that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but that’s what Kampung Lumapas residents found themselves facing in that boundary-placing year.

Many brothers thus carry Brunei Passports while my sis in law to be’s father and his entirely family carries Malaysian Passports. Now if you understand the economics between Brunei citizens and Limbang citizens you would wish to draw attention to the Malaysian authorities that it is long overdue they do Limbang citizens right, and make them proud to be Malaysians. The Zahid family will do our part with the sillaturahim of marriages etc, but the powers that be need to buck up and do the rest.

Back to the engagement event, praise be to God all went well yesterday. I didn’t do too badly I think, and hoped. As everybody was happy and smiling I presumed I had not grossly offended anyone by any rookie mistakes, and I think they liked my regaling of Islamic finance teaching tales in safari Africa and all. I knew that is always a fall back I can rely on. Alhamdulillah armed with this invaluable experience I’m now ready in sya Allah to handle more of such events as I may have to, for fatherless nieces and all. In sya Allah and Alhamdulillah.

Zahid.

C72

The Elusive Snow

Assalamu 'Alaikum

The Elusive Snow.

 

I recalled it used to snow at Easter in London during my student days in the seventies, so the family now on London trips, never held much hope for snow in London in winter, if it did it was a bonus. Last two trips, the family had to fit in Papa’s work time so we never expected any snow during the late November early December trips, and we were not wrong! This year the planning was for snow, although Papa has to make London a first stop for work purposes. The family, well Mama and Papa, homed in on Helsinki, for can it not snow in Helsinki in late November, early December?! Well, as we are finding out, it can, not snow in Helsinki in late November early December actually.

 

We’ve been here two days now and although the temperature is decidedly lower than London its not the snowy kind. The pictures of snowy Helsinki at the Tourist Centre were nice but it wasn’t happening then. Helsinki is a beautiful capital city at the southern coast of Finland surrounded by an archipelago of islands.  Vlad the handsome Finnish boy who greeted us at our apartment homestay tried very hard to search for snow in Finland where we can take a day trip by train, but Lappland at 700 km away was not quite the distance we had in mind, although it most certainly is the capital of snow. The Finnish girl at the City’s Tourist Centre also showed us a blotch in the centre of Finland in her laptop where it is currently snowing but she said its only 10 cm of snow and I surmised it might just not still be there if we were to take the 5 hour train ride there!

 

So we walked the beautiful lighted city of Helsinki, taking in the atmosphere. It was certainly their celebrative time of year, with street lamps that are iconized as reindeers. It was only half past three in the afternoon, but for someone from Malaysia who may be without a watch, it could easily be 9pm at night.

 

Helsinki seems a very nice quiet city, without the hullaballoo of London traffic and people jam. It’s more laid back with huge, rectangular box mansion-like buildings lining the streets, and well dressed people moving purposefully to their destinations.

 

Paying for tickets on trains can be a real challenge for the honest passenger though. Firstly there is no ticket counter at any station! The locals all seem to have that plastic thing which they touch at some reader thing as they enter the train. The visitors then would not have these plastics and is ready to pay with cash but there is nobody to take the cash!

 

Vlad said there will be someone to collect your money as you sit in the coach but nobody came. We asked, but the man said wait for the ticket collector to come. The ticket collector did not come as we arrived at Helsinki Main and the guy said go on, it means you don’t need to pay. Sure enough as we left the train and walked out of the station there was nobody at the exit requesting for tickets!

 

On the return trip home I was determined to pay my two adults and 3 children tickets but all the coaches said “No Ticket Sale”. I was a trifle bit confused- they don’t seem to want your money here! Then the coin dropped and I remembered Vlad said there will be one coach where there will be ticket sale! Sure enough we found the coach and we entered it, me absolutely determined to pay for the tickets.

 

Our policy overseas is to follow the rules to the letter, for we don’t want vacations spoiled by us not following foreign rules. We almost already reached our stop, when I saw the ticket collector. So I got up quickly and proffered her a 20 Euro note as the train arrived at our stop. She just smiled and waved us off the train without paying, as they was not enough time for her to do the ticket thing on her gadget. I failed again to pay, but comforted that this time it was no less than the ticket collector that let us off.

 

Today is Helsinki Zoo time and I did pay the train tickets this time. But I did not pay the bus tickets to the Zoo, as you can travel anywhere on any transport in Helsinki for free, after purchasing your first tickets, provided you do the travelling within one hour of your first ticket purchase.

 

So we found ourselves at Helsinki Zoo, which was on a little island connected by a short bridge from the Mainland. If you can imagine a zoo in the coldest freezer you can find in KL, that was Helsinki Zoo. The winds were icy and the day darkening as we went on our search for the polar bear. Well actually there were no polar bear at the zoo. In fact there were no animals at the zoo, that can be seen that is, all snugly hidden somewhere probably having a good laugh at the humans out there in the cold trying to eye them.

 

However after the bison and the elk, things got more exciting as we neared the end of the zoo. Close encounters of the furry but scary kind. We were face to face with Siberian leopards and an Alpha lion and his two lionesses. Although these are animals we should be familiar with coming from Malaysia this was the first time we were figuratively speaking, breath smelling close to these big cats separated only a by a two inch glass wall. The Lion King took a liking to my eldest daughter Adlin and was stretching his paws lightly pounding the glass door that separated him from Adlin. Adlin said the Alpha lion winked at her twice; I teased that’s probably because she looked like roast chicken to him, although I must say the lion comes across as a very friendly pussy cat.

 

The sea winds on our face in the zoo island made it seems as if it was cold enough to snow but it was not to be. All seems déjà vu our Korean trip in days gone by, also waiting for snow. Will it also has a snowy ending this time?

 

Zahid C72